Ani Update
Apr. 20th, 2010 12:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fivecats
She's still hanging in there...
In this image you can see that her one paw is much larger than the other. It's not just a trick of the camera, it's real. Her front right leg is swollen to almost twice the size of her other legs. On the underside, just above the joint, is an open wound about the size of a quarter. There are other, smaller areas up part of her leg that she's licked open as well. She still walks on the leg, somewhat, and has no trouble getting around. She's eating just fine and drinking water as well. She's not putting weight on the leg when she's sitting, though, and we can tell it hurts.
I'm giving her pain meds about every other day. She still fights me over them, but I know a good part of that is the indignation of having to be forced to do anything, even if it's something that will make her feel better.
Ani hasn't been one to seek out much affection. It wasn't until several years ago that she'd even come up to me for some love-on time -- and then only in the middle of the night when no one else was awake to witness it. Now, however, she's interested in having me go to bed early so she can settle in on the bed and, as well, spend some quiet time with me. And she doesn't seem to mind me curling up around her on the couch (as long as I keep my disgusting pig breath away from her, of course).
Bonn and I have both worried that she's hanging on for us, that she's afraid of what will happen to us (to me, especially) when she leaves. We've both told her that it's okay to go, that we love her and while we'll miss her deeply, we want her to not be in pain even moreso.
Like her brother Tigger, Ani has no tolerance for anything even resembling sadness or being maudlin. She avoided me for a week until I could get myself under control and remember to just be upbeat about loving her and appreciating any amount of time we still had together here before we meet up again at The Crab Shack.
Any goodbye of this sort is difficult; I don't think a long goodbye is any easier than a short one.
And, yeah, it still sucks.
...
